The Road Less Traveled
October 23, 2008
In a modern day world where convenience often wins over quality, it`s no surprise divorce rates are at an all time high. We`ve been preconditioned to think, if I don`t like something, I`m not doing it. If it`s not easy, I won`t even try. It`s all about me, me, me!
Kids are board with the computer, video games and TV off, complaining there`s “nothing to do”, while their traditional toys and game lay collecting dust in their rooms. Teenagers text message their friends on their cell phones instead of walking across the street to play. Mothers drive through a fast food window instead of cooking a home made dinner. Young couples go into marriage saying, “If it doesn`t work out, we can just get divorced”.
I have often been surprised to hear a couple who only recently got married, is now breaking up with no real attempt to stop divorce. Does anyone stop these days and consider how to save your marriage? What does marriage even mean these days in a world where you can basically take the express lane to divorce? Where you’re in one day, out the next. Is there no sanctity left? Are couples repeating vows in vain? What is out world coming to?
Thankfully, there are still people out there that care. There are still parents encouraging there kids to play outside. Teenagers who have to work hard for a buck. Mothers who still believe a nice dinner at home is important for her family. And, couples who believe that marriage is sacred and would try anything save their marriage.
If you are struggling with saving your marriage, but don`t know where to turn, there are a lot of resources out there you can turn to for help. Of course there is always traditional marriage counseling, but a professional marriage counselor can be expensive and often times overwhelming. Certain people feel uncomfortable sharing their personal and marriage problems with someone else. If you are uncomfortable, you likely won`t open up and therefore may not really benefit from the counseling. There are alternatives to counseling, such as at home marriage help, often referred to as “marriage fitness”.
One program I`ve heard of is marriage boot camp, by Mort Fertel. To me this is the perfect alternative to traditional counseling as you can order the CD`s and DVD`s on-line and work with them right from the comfort of your own home. There are also a lot of free on-line sources, such as: http://www.marriagemax.com/marriage-help-g.asp. Reading great articles and other couples stories is comforting and helps you realize you`re not alone. You can also check out on-line videos, such as http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PG0IpY6LSek, where you can see real couples who share their stories as well.
Whether you chose to see a counselor, take advantage of the free on-line sources, or choose an at home marriage fitness program, go into it with an open mind. Divorce should not be taken lightly. Remember your wedding vows, “for better or worse”. You promised to take this person through the ups and downs. When you placed that ring on your finger, you promised to stick with the other person even when things get tough. You not only owe it to the person you said “I do” too, but to yourself, your kids and your community!
In a fast food, fast money, fast paced world, why not slow down and take the road less traveled? Marriage takes hard work! But, the rewards are worth the effort. Divorce may seem like the easy way out, but it too takes hard work. If you`re going to put forth that mush effort, why not invest into try to fix the problem? Ultimately, some couples will put forth effort, but still make the decision to end their marriage, but at least then they know they gave it their best shot before giving up. Don`t end up regretting your decision in the future because you didn`t try your hardest. If you`ve done your best and still can`t make it work, at least you don`t have to live with the “what if`s”.
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